04-27-11 - All the world's indeed a stage

04-27-11
All the world's indeed a stage,
And we are merely players,
Performers and portrayers,
Each another's audience
Outside the gilded cage.
0 miles
Continuing the list of discoveries/things I learned as I had listed yesterday:
My President actually WAS born in America (like anyone who wasn’t mentally challenged didn’t already know that indisputably.)
The NFL Draft Starts tomorrow (Yeah!)
And the Royal Wedding will be over sometime soon (at least it isn’t lasting as long as the “Birther” crap!)
And writing notes on days when you’re typing up past notes leaves really little to talk about for that day.
I stay up until around 2:30 getting 4 days worth of posts up and two videos. (Man, those videos take a long time!)
REALLY ready for sleep.
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But since you deserve more/better posts than the paltry offering above I will present a little playlet I wrote from a dream on February 2nd (2:15 am!)
“The Examination of Mr. Seligmann”
Potential casting (as it was in my dream - voices mainly)
Dr. #1 - David Schwimmer or Henry Winkler)
Dr. #2 - George Clooney
Mr. Seligman - Bill Smitrovich
Dr. #1: Doctor! Thank you for coming so quickly. I wanted a second opinion.
Dr. #2: What’s up?
Dr. #1: Do you see what I’m looking at?
Dr. #2: The Patient’s ankle?
Dr. #1: His Backbone.
Dr. #2: His Backbone?
Dr. #1: Precisely.
Dr. #2: With that magnifying glass?
Dr. #1: Yes.
Dr. #2: uh, I’m a thoracic surgeon. What you need is an ophthalmologist.
Dr. #1: No time for simplistic jokes, Doctor.
Dr. #2: Really?
Dr. #1: Look at these markings on the ankle bone. It’s clearly his spinal column!
Dr. #2: How do you account for that, Doctor?
Dr. #1: This man’s spinal column has retreated to this point and is inclining towards his heal.
Dr. #2: You’re saying…
Dr. #1: This man is spineless! He could snap at any second!
Dr. #2: (Or flop over, more likely…)
Seligmann: Guys! I’m right here! I’m not under anesthesia.
Dr. #2: Of course you are. Hello!
Dr. #1: See!…any second!!
Dr. #2: So…you’re saying his spineless
Seligmann: “Nearly” spineless!
Dr. #2: Pardon, me. His “nearly” spineless condition could become his…”Achilles’ Heal”?
Dr. #1: No time for cheap humor!
Dr. #2: Are you sure?
Dr. #1: Look at that backbone!!!
Seligmann: It’s a dog scratch. It’s how the scab healed.
Dr. #2: (to Seligman) Why are you here?
Seligmann: I came in to have a planter’s wart removed. Why are you here?
Dr. #2: I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Seligmanm: Me too! That’s where the wart is! On the other foot.
Dr. #2: (sotto voce) …And there it is!
Dr. #1: This is Serious, Doctor! This man has obviously been in a high pressure career that has forced his spine to retreat down to his feet.
Dr. #2: Such as?
Dr. #1: Advertising Executive comes to mind…
Selegmann: I’m a college professor.
Dr. #1: …or some high minded mathematic academic…
Seligmann: I’m a Literature professor.
Dr. #1: …who has to worry about getting fired…
Seligmann: I’m tenured.
Dr. #1: …getting ill treated by the department head.
Seligmann: I’m the Dean.
Dr. #1: Listen…who’s the professional here?
Dr. #2: Good question.
Seligmann: Well, counting myself, I’d say maybe two of us are…
Dr. #1: Exactly!
Dr. #2: (to Seligmann) Thank you.
Seligmann; You’re welcome…I like your timing…
Dr. #1: What? Uh,…well…who are the doctor’s in the room.
Seligman: I am.
Dr. #2: Me, too.
Seligmann: Look! I came in to get a wart removed from my foot…the other, so far unseen foot. I’m leaving now to go to a Lasik center to see if they can blast it off!
Dr. #2: “S-Mart” has wart remover.
Seligmann: ( to Dr. #2) Good Call! (to Dr. #1) And don’t even dare to try to bill me for this! I’ll sue you so bad you’ll end up changing bed pans at Bethesda!
[walking off] …and I’ve got the Teacher’s Union behind me…
Dr. #2: Now, That’s backbone!
Seligman (off stage) Heard that…love the timing, Doc!
Dr. #1: (proudly) Did you see him stride out of here? So strong! Another success!
Dr. #2: (leaving) Have fun in Bethesda!
Dr. #1: Bethesda? That’s in Maryland! This is Bellevue!
(end scene)
I hope you’ve enjoyed our little play…otherwise…I got nada.